I've been dating this great guy for six month's now. I'm really happy and don't really have anything to complain about when it comes to "us". The reason I'm writing is more out of curiosity than concern. My guy likes to wear a giant strap-on dildo in bed. Is this normal? I mean, he uses his tool as well, but he always starts with a giant strap-on cock and uses it during foreplay and then for intercourse and then finally switches to himself. I'm not really complaining, as a matter of fact, I kind of enjoy it. I'm just really curious as to why he seems so into this...any insight?

Yeah, as a matter of fact we've got plenty of insight on this one. The answer is complex and anything but obvious so we'll break it down in several layers.

Why does he do it? There are some really basic erotic elements that are at play for most men (and women) who enjoy wearing a strap-on dildo during sex. Any one of these elements would be reason enough for your guy to enjoy utilizing a dong other than his own during intercourse.

Staying power: When your guy is going at you with nine inches of silicone, he can go all night without even thinking of baseball. You see, while we're thrusting in and out of our lovers, our basic, carnal instinct is to bask in the passion of the act. We want to watch as our cock thrusts deeply inside of you and withdraws wetter than it was on it's way in. We want to observe the way your glistening skin envelops our manhood and expands and contracts around us with all that warmth and wonder. We want to stare at your beautiful breasts or ogle your incredible ass and grip your hips or wrap ourselves around your thighs as we attempt to delve deeper and deeper. Most of all we want to hear your moans. We want to know we're pleasing you via the sounds you make or the feeling of your hot breath on our necks or in our ears. But, you see there's a downside to all of this indulgence. If we did all that, if we took it all in right from the start, we'd have all the staying power of a fifteen year old at his first go-round. It'd be over too soon...way too soon. The strap-on allows a man to fully submerge himself in all the sights and sounds that make intercourse so damn hot, all the while completely focusing on your pleasure instead of on baseball (or any other "control" thought process). When you've had your fill, he can switch to his own cock and focus on his own pleasure and it's a "win-win" for both of you.

Fantasy fulfillment: If we're going to be honest here, most of us are not porn stars. Most of us have average sized equipment. There's nothing to be ashamed of here, but we've got to admit, there's something extremely erotic about watching a huge cock shimmy it's way into a tight pussy. Since most of us are not going to invite Mandingo into our boudoirs to have at it with our significant others, a dildo molded from the massive manhood of one of our favorite porn stars can really do the trick. By wearing Julian's giant cock, a man's able to watch as nine inches of thrusting power penetrates his lover. He may be able to accomplish positions he normally couldn't or he may be interested in penetrating his lover anally with his cock while he fills her vagina with the strap-on for maximum stimulation. And while all this fantasy fucking is taking place, there's no threat looming in the back of his mind that his girl is going to run off with a rubber penis. Relationship-safe fucking fantasy fulfilled.

You're a size-queen: You've got to face facts ladies. Some of you are size-queens. The bigger, the better is an understatement when it comes to describing your appetite for massive manhood. You really love your husband or boyfriend and he's good in bed but he's no John Holmes. As men, we can control our technique. We can vary our approach. We can even dress up as a milk man if that's what does it for you. We cannot, however, change what the Goddess gave us. If you're in a secure relationship and your girl's looking for a thrill with more inches than the ruler you're packing, strap one on! You'll both be surprised at the results.

Why don't more men do it?

Okay, so now you've got a basic understanding of why your guy likes to pack heat. Next question on our readers minds might be why more men don't try it. If you're a heterosexual woman and you've experimented with same sex flings or if you're bi-sexual or of the lesbian persuasion, you're probably quite aware of the pleasures associated with strap-on's. In these cases, they're necessary for penetration and picking out the dong you'd like to experience is strictly a matter of personal preference.

Bring a man into the picture and rampant insecurities can make this endeavor a horror show. Most men don't "go there" because, quite simply, they're insecure. They feel threatened by the size of a dildo. If they do try it, they might be hurt by the fact that their lover seemed to respond to the dildo more than she does to his own penis. Clearly, an insecure man is not ready to enter the realm of the strap-on. This is unfortunate as both he and his lover might be missing out an a new way to spice things up. For the guys out there who'd love to hear their lover moan at the thrust of a giant-sized cock or if you'd just like to prolong your intercourse sessions, we say give it a try! A rubber cock will never replace a living breathing member, but you just might find the variation adds some new thrills to an already exciting ride!

For the SheVibe reader who wrote in with this question, as long as this practice is something you enjoy, or at the very least, don't mind, go with it! And be glad that your guy is secure in his feelings for you and your lovemaking